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*Tuesday, May 18, 2010

-+SeLecTiVe BeHaViOuR

uniquely special.

for someone who doesnt like doing sales and told herself that she will never get into sales job ever in her life.
by chance she came here
by choice she stayed on
by destiny that she met you.
in a way, her friend brought her in and gave that chance.
the chance to meet you, the chance to let you change her life.
how someone could impact that much in a person, it's fate.
fated that they met, fated that things going to change.

in by mistake,
stayed by decision.

the thought of having a friend to work together made her came fore to this supposedly avoided job.
1 month later, friend left.
she thought that her boss was nice.
she thought that she felt unknown comfort here.
she thought that they are short-handed and not as if she cant work.
so she decided to stay to help her nice boss.

(she's one who usually friend left, will have the urge to leave together because she felt uncomfortable. however, she, unknowingly found some special comfort here and she's glad she found.)

she understand how depressing it is when people comes and go
she understand how it feels to stand alone fighting
she understand how one need support in tough times
so she cant bear to leave her boss in lurch, she stayed.

time goes by,
path is shown that her decision was right.
she gained a nice boss, a nice friend that she knows she will remember and cherish for life.

days are wonderful, sweet and memorable.
she admires her, adore her, respect her, look up to her.
she wants to provide more than just what a colleague does.
A friend.
she knows she will be hurt, knowing and unknowingly.
given the different character each had.
however, in order to let this unique friend went pass just like that,
she go against the odds to avoid any regrets in future.

(she, never wants to leave her life with regrets which up till now, hasnt got any, what more this time)

true enough,
she got hurt every now and then due to her sensitiveness.
she cried every now and then due to other's insensitiveness.
she knew she had to go through this because she chose it.
she had no one to blame.

she doesnt like other's to really know what she's feeling.
she wants to show others the way other wish to see
she wants to speak the way other wish to hear.
she always feel that other's happiness is more important than hers
especially of people she deem importance.

she can cry like a baby like nobody's business
the next moment she can be as nice as though nothing had happen.
just for the fear of losing what's important the moment she shown her trueself.

she knows that moment of anger can cause moment of folly.
therefore she always project the good and swallow the bad.


slowly,
the comfort she was depending on, moved on.
she was devastated.
she thought, what was the point of staying anymore?
she lost what was important to her sight.

time proven, surprisingly,
what was important to sight,
was important to mind as well.

she continued to work hard.
she knew her comfort was just nearby,
as long as she worked hard
comfort is within reach.
most important is, as long as she is here, her comfort will come back.

Lord grant wishes for people who want it bad enough.
it almost felt as though miracles do exist.
from a distance till comfort within reach.
even though it's not exactly of reach but Lord is kind.
she thought to herself, she should be contented.
Lord though did not grant the way she wants it to but He tried his best.

no one see the shine she had on her face.
no one see how overjoyed she was
no one see how grateful she felt
when she persevered and she was given what she wanted.

she was glad she still can be nice to her friend.
she was glad she still can be there for her friend.
she was glad she still lingers around her friend.
she was... still is... very very glad and appreciative.

(she is a very clingy friend. she wants to stick to with her friend and she doesnt just stick to anyone except someone close to heart.)

so clingy,
she was afraid that her friend will be annoyed.
she was afraid that her friend will not be happy.
she was afraid that her friend will find her irritating/pestering.

sensitive, uncertainty, worries, fears
at times she had so much of those,
she never do what she wanted to
she never say what she wanted to
just afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing.

foundation isnt build from stretch,
she had her fears and worries.
she hate rejections as well.
it crippled her. it builds a wall for her to not move forward.
so she, rather not do, not say a single thing.
and because it hurts to get rejections in not the way she could take it.

she treasures those safe keep friendship she build.
she wants to feel something from her friends.
she wants a place in their heart, not just lingering outside.
she matters quality way more than quantity.


days as per normal.
she continued to work hard,
to stay within this compound.
to continue to have her comfort,
have her friend.

however, she did wonder.
if her friend is no longer within this compound,
what will she do.
does she still have a purpose to stay here?
does it still matters if she stay here?
is it still important to her anymore?

to see the sight of her friend leaving,
she thought...
might as well she leave first.
perhaps it will be less heartwrenching.
because... she knows she wont be able to take it... and to continue to work as per normal.

she is very thankful because of her friend, she found this kind of unexplainable comfort.
this kind of satisfactions at work, she never thought she would have.
just because of one person, it brings her to another kind of heaven, to a staircase of hopes and dream fulfiling moments.

her friend might not know what exactly she had done to her.
but whatever she had done cant be seen, it got to be felt and understand.
that is why, she is an angel to her. she can be seen as a light of hope in her life.

she believe, when the time her friend leave her side, it's when she has to be or already trained to be independent. things happen for a reason and she always believe whoever she is close with or she likes, have a purpose or responsiblity to guide her in her life. some are just passby advisers, some are lifetime advisers. which do you wish to be?

friends are your teacher in life.
knowing her friend, builds her character, builds her mind, her heart.
that is why no matter what happens, she will be there for her.
no matter what happens.....

she gains a teacher, motivator, friend.
her friend gains a true blue loyal friend.

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by teddi^.^ sealed off @ 1:02 AM.

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