only recently ive realised i haven been blogging for 1mth plus.
everything had been revolved around my work and Her.
i still have my reservations for her.
truthfully, im still afraid.
afraid of getting hurt again.
afraid of walking the escaping route i choose the last time i was hurt again.
afraid of feeling the same pain again.
i believed im blinded.
so blinded to even feel if she's real.
why does my fear wont go away?
mainly because..
it is the degree of "seems close to a person" that actually scares me.
i fear to be one of the victim.
im afraid that she's nice to me because
she knows im easily affected.
she dont want to lose a workable worker.
ive been enjoying really enjoyable moments with her.
like buying breakfast for her every mth when we still can eat in office.
having lunch together. (esp ones she initiated)
even times like walking her to the taxi stand and acc her wait for taxi,
staying in the office with her to wait for her "chauffeur",
accompany her find her uncle's vase.
just love to have her presence irregardless of what we are doing.
i appreciate her as she is.
she is one of the chosen fren among all that i wish to keep.
if she could stay, i'll jolly well treasure her.Labels: ^roro, momentous